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Find out how to Write an Book

June 8th, 2010 |

Author: admin

The toughest a part of writing is the primary sentence.While you look at the entire venture, it looks like an
impossible task. That’s why you must break it downinto manageable tasks. Consider climbing a mountain.You are standing on the foot of it and looking up atits summit vanishing into the clouds. How can you
presumably scale such an immense and harmful mountain?

There is only one method to climb a mountain ? step by
step.

Now think of writing your book in the same light. You
must create it step by step, and in the future, you will
take that last step and find yourself standing on the
summit together with your head in the clouds.

The first thing you have to do, as for those who actually
had been a mountain climber, is to get organized. As a substitute
of climbing gear, nevertheless, you will need to manage your
thoughts. There are some steps you need to take before
you begin. As soon as you’ve got gone by the next
list, you can be prepared to really start writing your
ebook.

Beginning Steps to Writing an e-book

First, figure out your ebook’s working title. Jot down
a few completely different titles, and ultimately, you’ll discover
that one that can grow on you. Titles show you how to to
focus your writing in your subject; they guide you in
anticipating and answering your reader’s queries. Many
non-fiction books even have subtitles. Aim for clarity
in your titles, however cleverness at all times helps to sell
books ? so long as it’s not too cute. For instance,
Remedies for Insomnia: twenty different ways to rely
sheep. Or: Get off that sofa: fifteen train plans
to whip you into shape.

Subsequent, write out a thesis statement. Your thesis is a
sentence or two stating precisely what drawback you are
addressing and how your guide will resolve that problem.
All chapters spring forth from your thesis statement.
As soon as you’ve obtained your thesis assertion advantageous-tuned,
you’ve got constructed your foundation. From that foundation,
your guide will develop, chapter by chapter.

Your thesis will hold you targeted while you write your
ebook. Keep in mind: all chapters must help your thesis
statement. If they do not, they do not belong in your
book. For instance, your thesis statement might learn:
We have all skilled insomnia at instances in our lives,
however there are twenty confirmed strategies and strategies to
offer you back a good night time’s sleep.

After getting your thesis, earlier than you begin to write,
ensure there’s a good reason to put in writing your book.
Ask your self some questions:

* Does your book present helpful info and is
that info at present related?

* Will you e-book positively affect the lives of your
readers?

* Is your e book dynamic and can it preserve the reader’s
consideration?

* Does you ebook answer questions which are significant
and significant?

In the event you can reply sure to these questions, you may really feel
assured about the potential of your ebook.

Another essential step is to figure out who your
target market is. It’s this group of people you
will be writing to, and this group will dictate many
components of your e-book, such as fashion, tone, diction,
and even length. Determine the age range of your
readers, their general gender, what they are most
fascinated by, and even the socio-economic group they
primarily come from. Are they individuals who learn trend
magazines or guide reviews? Do they write letters in
longhand or spend hours day by day online. The extra you
can pin down your target audience, the better it should
be to write your e book for them.

Subsequent, make a listing of the reasons you’re writing your
ebook. Do you need to promote your online business? Do you
want to carry high quality site visitors to your website? Do you
want to enhance your fame?

Then write down your objectives by way of publishing. Do
you want to promote it as a product in your website, or
do you need to supply it as a free reward for filling out
a survey or for ordering a product? Do you need to use
the chapters to create an e-course, or use your e-book
to draw affiliates around the world? The more you
know upfront, the better the precise writing will be.

Resolve on the format of your chapters. In non-fiction,
keep the format from chapter to chapter fairly
consistent. Maybe you plan to use an introduction to
your chapter matter, and then divide it into four
subhead topics. Or you might plan to divide it into five
components, each one beginning with a related anecdote.

The way to make your ebook “user friendly”

You must determine learn how to preserve your writing engaging.
Often anecdotes, testimonials, little tales, images,
graphs, recommendation, and ideas will keep the reader turning
the pages. Sidebars are helpful for fast, accessible
information, and so they break up the density of the
page.

Write with a casual, conversational tone quite than a
formal tone similar to textbook diction. Reader’s respond
to the sensation that you are having a conversation with
them. Break up the size and structure of your
sentences so you don?t hypnotize your readers into
sleep. Sentences which can be all the identical size and
structure tend to be an excellent assist for insomnia!

Good writing takes practice. It takes tons and plenty of
practice. Make a schedule to jot down at least a page a
day. Read books and magazines concerning the process of
writing, and jot down suggestions that leap out at you. The
artwork of writing is a lifetime process; the more you
write (and skim), the higher your writing will become.
The better your writing turns into, the bigger your sales
figures.

In an e-book that’s learn on the display screen, bear in mind that
you should give your reader’s eye a break. You are able to do
this by using white space. In art classes, white
space is normally referred to as “unfavorable space.”
Reader’s eyes must relaxation in the cool white oasises
you create on your page. In case your web page is too dense,
your reader will stop out of it as soon as their eyes
begin to tear.

Make use of lists, each bulleted and numbered. This
makes your data simple to soak up, and offers the
reader a psychological break from dissecting your paragraphs
one after the other.

Lastly, determine on an easy-to-read design. Discover a font
that is straightforward on the eyes, and persist with that font
family. Using dozens of fonts will solely tire your
readers out before they’ve gotten past your
introduction. Use at least one and a half line
spacing, and text massive enough to be read easily on
the screen, however small enough in order that the entire page
may be seen on a computer screen. You will have to
experiment with this to search out the fitting combination.

Of course, don’t forget to run a spell and grammar
check. You are judged by one thing as minor as right
punctuation, so don?t mess up a terrific e book by tossing
out semicolons randomly, or stringing sentences
together with commas. (By the way, that is referred to as a
“comma splice.”)

Last of all, create an index and a bibliography.
That is it! You’ve written a ebook! Now all you have to
do is publish your book on-line, and wait for obtain
request from your web site visitors.

Legit Writing Competition Information

June 6th, 2010 |

Author: admin

Even though there are numerous legitimate contests for writers, unfortunately there also seems to be various questionable competitions developed to “scam” aspiring writers.

Numerous iniquitous individuals and/or crafty organizations have capitalized on the naivete or desperation of beginning writers, who are so eager to get published that they’re willing to pay outrageous fees to enter contests that “guarantee” they will get published or promise thousands of dollars in prizes…

The prize cash pledged in some of these competitions might in no way really exist. The so-called “contest sponsors” may in no way choose a winner and just continue to collect writing submissions and the cash from the unsuspecting “entrants.”

So how can you tell a hoax from a true contest?

There are some simple ideas that might seem time-consuming and trivial, but can be well-worth your effort.

Look for annual competitions which have a history plus a list of previous winners.

Look for competitions which list the judges – and then choose the ones that boast published writers, editors and/or agents.

Look for a contact name, address, telephone number for future reference. Like to request a list of winners.

Try to find a deadline date for the contest and a date when winners will be announced.

Look for writing competitions with no or minimal entry charges.

If you discover a contest that requires an entry charge of more than £5 or £10 – read the fine print – find out what you are getting for your cash…

For instance, some legitimate contests may charge an entry charge and offer a critique of your work – regardless of whether you win or not – in return for your efforts and cash.

Carefully think about the value from the prizes. Are you willing to attempt to write 1,500 words about a topic you’re not familiar with – so that you can have a chance at winning a £20 gift certificate

For a global writing competitions check out this creative writing competition

Two Errors of Copywriting which You Must Avoid

June 5th, 2010 |

Author: admin

There are formats to follow for whatever form your writing takes, be it movie scripts, advertising or books, and there is also a proper way to write effective sales copy. There is more to copywriting than just giving out a long string of information though, as you need to include a sales message that intrigues your audience. Your message to the prospective customer is not only why they should choose you to buy from, but how they will benefit from doing so.

It’s no surprise that copywriting is the most sure-fire way to turn sales into a real profit-maker. But as is true in any field, there are mistakes in copywriting which must be avoided. In fact, committing these errors not only drives your conversion ratio down, it causes your sales to plummet; this is no understatement. If you write a piece of content that looks like a copy but has many mistakes, then you can surely expect to see your sales going down, day after day. The following is some “no nonsense” advice to help you avoid writing bad copy.
The first thing to remember is the importance of split testing. Failure to do this with your copy is one of the most common mistakes made.

As an extremely effective way of seeing what does and doesn’t work, split testing will help you write successful copy. As a result of not split testing their articles, many copywriters will fail to see any great results. They just write one version of a sales copy and put it out, that’s about it. These individuals put all of their eggs into one basket and then cannot understand why it is that they are not succeeding. By making even the most minute of changes in your sales copy, the conversion rate on the web can fluctuate greatly. One of the best methods for altering your conversion rate is to upgrade the quality of the headline on the copy.

But there are still many copywriters out there who put all their hopes on one version, inviting disappointment if results are lower than expected. As a result, many opportunities can be lost.

Another issue many young copywriters have is that they do not value “white space” as a tool that can ultimately improve their copy. Instead of breaking their article into smaller pieces that make it easier for the reader, they write one long article. They just write their copy one huge never ending block, which goes on forever. As a result, the reader will tire of the piece and move on. Of course you hope to make your copy as clear and concise as possible so as not to confuse your prospect. By breaking your article into pieces and spacing them a bit, you make it easier for your reader to understand your product. Subheadings, screen shots and testimonials in separate boxes may be added to break up the copy more attractively. These elements break the copy so that anyone reading it doesn’t feel overwhelmed. So if you want to make sure to engage your reader, present your copy in smaller sections. You will be sure to get a better response to your article.

When all is said and done, copywriting is an art form which is perfected only over time. As with most skills, patience with yourself and practice are required. If you listen to the tips in this article, practice, and learn from your mistakes soon you will learn just how powerful your words can be.

Want more info?

The Best Traffic Generating Strategies for Online Marketers

Are you submitting articles?

June 4th, 2010 |

Author: admin

Are you submitting articles for backlinks?

When it comes to marketing your products and services online there is one thing every website owner needs and that is web traffic. Now you can get traffic from many different sources online like joint ventures, email marketing, pay per click (ppc) and others but one great source of traffic is from search engines like Google and others. And this traffic source will for affiliate programs, your own products, cpa marketing, and much much more.

If you can get free search engine traffic then you website will basically run itself. It will sit there on the Internet, receiving traffic and taking orders for you even while you slumber without any additional work for you. Its a great place to get free web traffic and YES i said FREE. You dont have to pay for it or constantly work for it once your website shows up in the top 10 results of the search engines for a particular keyword set phrase.

And thats why immediately I would like to ask you a question.

Are you submitting articles every week to build keyword dense backlinks for your websites? If not, you NEED to be. Articles are a great way to generate long term backlinks on the net that will shoot your website listing to the top of the search engines like Google, Yahoo, and Bing.

Just make sure to include your website URL in the article at littlest a few times with a keyword dense link. Just using your domain name or URL in the article is not enough. You need to make sure your link is a HTML hyper link with a keyword in it. That keyword will be the search phrase that your website will start to rank higher for.

And that is today’s online business tip!

For more Internet Marketing advice I highly suggest you check out a website known as http://www.MyMarketingAcademy.com for more internet marketing tools and helpful advice on how to get more traffic and how to make more money online with your website. At MyMarketingAcademy you will find hundreds of step-by-step tutorials that will walk you through everything you need to know about how to make a full time income online while working a lot less than a regular job.

Create a Successful Email Campaign in Three Steps

June 3rd, 2010 |

Author: admin

A successful online selling strategy is critical if you want your business to be a success. There are many opportunities to market your business online, and email campaigns have become one of the best ways. They are relatively cheap, easy to run with the aid of the right email marketing software, and they are highly effective if you know what it takes to create a successful campaign. If you want to harness the power of email marketing for your business and reach new customers, increase business, and make more money, you need to remember these three important points to developing an effective campaign.

Plan Your Campaign
Like any marketing endeavor, email marketing takes time. Rushing in to sending emails to random people trying to drum up business for your companyrarely does any good and often causes problems when you get flagged for sending spam. You need to develop clear objectives and identify a target market if you want your campaign to succeed. Once you know what you want your email marketing campaign to accomplish and you know who will be interested in your product or business, you can then start developing your marketing emails. Don’t send a football promotion to a dentist for example as it’s not directly related to the business.

Personalize Your Strategy
If you want to grab the attention of your reader, personalising your emails is the best way to do so. Readers want to know how your product or business will benefit them and what they are getting out of the deal. Not only do you want to personalise your emails with the names of subscribers, but you want to give specific information as to why purchasing your product, joining your business, or using your service is a good idea for hem. When you treat your customer like individuals and not generic customers by thinking about what their needs and interests are, you will sell more products and reduce being flagged as spam.

Identify What Works
It is crucial for the success of your email marketing campaign that you have some way to track and manage your emails so that you can identify which messages and methods are the most effective in achieving your goals. Once you have identified what works the best you can then modify your subsequent messages to use these methods and achieve more success. The world of email marketing is not a static one, rather is is dynamic and should be ever changing to reflect the interests of your customers and the methods that you have identified as the most effective.

How to draft a news release

June 3rd, 2010 |

Author: admin

Press releases are probably the most common form of promotional document there is. But also press release writing is undoubtedly the most misunderstood by marketers. Feel free to download my free press release writing template here.

The danger for the inexperienced marketer is the temptation to fill the press release with puffs and promotional offers. Remember that you are expecting trained journalists (not primarily bloggers or article writers) who are entrusted with high circulation publications to be impressed by your product without explaining in real terms how it will benefit their readers.

So let’s cut to the chase and run through some guidelines here:-

Type 1: Paper press releases to be released physically by fax or snail mail.

1) Don’t for get your logo at the top. Sounds like an obvious one that doesn’t it? Well not really. It’s amazing how many companies still send news releases out without one.

2) Keep your language simple and to the point without being flowery. Don’t use five words when one will do e.g. “It is possible for customers to” “they can”

3) Beginners should use the three paragraph format on one side of A4 although there are longer versions. Let’s stick to the three paragraph version in this article.

4) Formatting: News Release at the top. To the left indicate when the press release is available from (avoid embargos like the plague). 1.5 space the text and single space the “Note to Editors” Include your immediate contact details here. Leave wide margins for notes.

5) Headline should be boldened, relevant and keyword biased. Attempts to be witty wil almost certainly be met with yawns. They do the jokes! “You can get slim by thinking about it says psychologist.”

6) First paragraph: Tell the whole story and nothing but the story. Who? What? When? Where? Which? Why? e.g. “You can put on muscle tone just by thinking about exercise according to a report by a top psychologist, Dr Tim Jones at a conference in New York today.

7) Second paragraph reinforces the story and might include a quote e.g. “Dr. Jones was speaking at the International Psychology Conference where he delivered his findings from experiments on 26 office workers.”

Third paragraph will be a call to action or invitation (this is your chance to sell your location) e.g. ” Dr Jones has his own webinar on the subject and wil be inviting readers to ask him questions this Wednesday at www.drtimjonesinc.com….”

9) End the press release with ENDS so that you don’t run the risk of any of your private contact details being published to the world.

10) Include a “note to editors” if you are inviting them to a photocall or other press event online or locally. perhaps you might wish to inform them that there are photographs available. Don’t forget to proofread and grammar check. Sometimes crucial phone numbers and website addresses can be typed in wrongly.

Type 2: email

As above except:-

4) Use normal text based emails single spaced. If you want to use HTML, check with the publisher first. In fact you should never spam editors with unsolicited emails anyway. You wil soon find out how they want your email by having a conversation with them preferably by phone or at least an advance email. Mass submitter software is not recommended for press releases.

If you are still nervous about writing your own press releases or content, we do offer a copywriting service at Effective Publicity which is cheaper than you think.

Organic versus Optimised Search

June 3rd, 2010 |

Author: admin

Organic Search is a simple and competent solution for many websites. It can, and often is, done by website owners for little or no cost without the help of a professional Search Engine Optimisation firm.

Your website is designed, structured and written by you or your website designer to be search engine friendly. It should contain rich, relevant content with lots of links.

Meta Tags are sensibly written and added to the site code.

Your URL is then manually submitted to the leading national and global search engines and directories.

This can be very productive for specific searches as follows:

Brand or Product searches e.g. “Microsoft Office”. If you are looking for the supplier of Microsoft Office products, you will find microsoft.com, among many, many others.

Company searches e.g. “Microsoft” or “Apple”. Someone who knows of your company and simply wants to find out more will find microsoft.com and apple.com with ease.

Organic search can be effective for broader searches too. Terms like “Edinburgh website design“, yield web designers, that are either based in or serve the Edinburgh area, very effectively.

If you are doing your own Search Engine Optimisation (SEO), then, unless you are one of the few real SEO experts out there, then you are probably not getting the results that you need in this highly aggressive market. This is where Optimised search comes into play for many people.

Optimised Search

So how do you get a top ranking in the major search engines like Google, Yahoo, Bing, etc if you are in a highly competitive commodity market (e.g. online CD sales), deal with people who will not recognise your brand or are in a very fiercely contested service industry?

This is where Organic Search may have its limit. There are thousands of competing online retailers and services. Your brand and company name are unlikely to mean anyone to someone who is looking for a particular product or service for the first time.

To make matters worse, there are possibly thousands of sites offering goods or services in your area that are not actually based there. So, the chances of your site making the critical Top 50 or 100 for your specific search term or keywords are remote.

Yes, DIY Organic search in great, when it is done effectively. But there are limitations to it as we all know. So perhaps it is time to hire a professional SEO firm to create and/or optimise your online presence or advertising campaigns. Otherwise, you risk lack of exposure, reduced sales, poor brand recognition and ultimately lower profits.

Is that truly worth it just so that you can save some money in the short term by trying to do this yourself? You know the answer to that one!

The Internet is Creating A Divide Between The Information Rich, And Those Not Connected, The Information Poor

June 3rd, 2010 |

Author: admin

The Final Information Frontier – The internet Connected Versus People who find themselves Not Connected

As a 45 year old male, growing up as a teenager, I did not have access to the internet because it had not yet been invented. Similarly, mobile phone handsets were some thing of the future. As a teenager living in the home, my only communication device was the house telephone, a landline invented by Alexander Graham Bell back in the 1870’s. Just how do I know this – well I knew who invented the revolutionary day telephone mainly because it was taught in class. How do I know when the telephone was invented? Easy – I checked Google and it gave me a wide variety of articles to select from to choose the information – 3 seconds to type the query – less than a second to find a first page of results. Why? The power of article submission plus the article directory that hosts them.

My problem becoming an adult was that no-one could reach me on the phone because my single mother used to get home and all her friends and chat all night. Call waiting had yet to be invented. If I needed to see some one I got in my car and drove to their place.

Today, you can discover specifics of absolutely every thing online using a variety of search engines like google. Google is the one that I personally use both recreationally and professionally. From a professional basis, I work in a call centre that targets employers to chat about work candidates, and I am in charge of engaging employers in a different state than I live in. How do I do this – again easy, I use Google. I also get a number of inbound calls from employers from all around the country who think that I am local to them considering that the number they dial is local which is then forwarded to our national free call number.
While this is not about me, I really want you to learn that when some one calls from a place that I have never heard of, don’t know what state there’re calling from I immediately open Google maps and within moments know where there’re located and for that reason can continue a conversation on a more local level.

I bore you with this as numerous people don’t understand the strength of the online world, nor how beneficial it usually is. As an example, lets talk articles accessible online. It does not matter what you want, there is an online article that will address the niche matter you are seeking no matter what the niche is. And the good thing is that while there are a number of spammy articles around, Google understands how to measure each search request and delivers to you what it considers the best results. While Google may sometimes bring back irrelevant search results, these results are more than often deleted out with days if not hours due to Google’s ability to learn how long people spend on sites and how quickly people hit the back button on their browser.

Simply speaking, the knowledge age is certainly upon us, no mater if you are seeking the solution to who played what in what movie, what the lyrics are for your favorite song, or what is the best hotel to stay in while in Majorca.

Now imagine should your children and your family on the whole do not have the net. So how exactly does homework get done? How do new recipes reach your table? How do you know the best debit card or insurance cover to get started with? And how much time do you physically spend paying bill weekly as opposed to spending 5 minutes on online banking.

Currently the internet is the biggest divide between whoever has – The information rich as opposed to the individuals who do not have, the knowledge poor.

Six Discoveries That Science Cannot Explain

June 3rd, 2010 |

Author: admin

We like to feel superior to the people who lived centuries ago, what with their shitty mud huts and curing colds by drilling a hole in their skulls. But we have to give them credit: They left behind some artifacts that have left the smartest of modern scientists scratching their heads.

For instance, you have the following enigmas that we believe were created for no other purpose than to fuck with future generations.

#6. The Voynich Manuscript

The Mystery:

The Voynich manuscript is an ancient book that has thwarted all attempts at deciphering its contents. And it’s not like some idiot just scribbled a bunch of nonsense on paper and went, “Figure THIS out, fuckwads.” It is actually an organized book with a consistent script, discernible organization and detailed illustrations.

It appears to be a real language–just one that nobody has seen before. And it really does appear to mean something. But nobody knows what.

Translation: “…and when you get her to put the tennis racket in her mouth, have her stand in a fountain for a while. Then draw pictures of her.”

There is not even a consensus on who wrote it, or even when it was written. And we sure as fuck don’t know why.

Why Can’t They Solve It?

Could you? Look at this shit:

Don’t even try. Expert military code-breakers, cryptographers, mathematicians, linguists, people who get paid to find and decipher patterns, have all been left unable to decipher a single word. Interesting articles.

As you can imagine, proposed solutions have been all over the board, from reasonable to completely clownshit. Some say it’s an unbreakable code that requires a key to solve. Some say it’s a hoax, and a damned fine one if we do say ourselves. Some say it’s glossolalia, which is the fine art of speaking or writing something you don’t understand but that is being channeled to you by God or aliens or whatever (note that the word was chosen specifically to make you sound retarded when saying it).

Our Guess:

It’s written in English, by a person who was extremely shitty at writing in English.

#5. The Antikythera Mechanism

The Mystery:

The Antikythera mechanism is an ancient, intricate machine found in a shipwreck near Greece that dates back to about 100 BC. The Antikythera mechanism contains gears and structures that were not found in devices again for 1000 years, and only then when the Muslims and Chinese were busy inventing shit while the Europeans were busy killing each other.

Why Can’t They Solve It?

First, no one can agree on where the Antikythera mechanism was made or who designed it. Popular belief was that it was made by the Greeks due to its instructions all being in Greek (about a million of our tax dollars were probably spent arriving at that genius conclusion) but serious research published in serious places suggested the design came from Sicily.

And a billion parts with indecipherable instructions suggest it comes from Ikea. Ba-zing!

The mechanism, aside from placing you at serious risk for severing a finger, was supposedly used to figure out astronomical positions. The problem with that is that at the time this thing was made, no one had yet discovered laws of gravity or how heavenly bodies moved.

In other words, the Antikythera mechanism appears to have functions that no one alive at that time would have understood, and no single mechanical purpose of that era (such as navigating ships) explains the crazy number of functions and settings this machine has.

Our Guess:

It’s a scrap from a time machine that exploded the moment it arrived in the past.

#4. The Baigong Pipes

The Mystery:

In an area of China not known to ever contain people, let alone industry, there are three mysterious triangular openings on top of a mountain containing hundreds of ancient rusty iron pipes of unknown origin. Some of the pipes go deep into the mountain. Some of them go into a nearby salt water lake. There are more pipes in the lake, and more still running east-west along the lake shore. Some of the larger pipes are 40 cm in diameter, are of uniform size and are placed in what seems like purposeful patterns.

Hey, vagina caves.

So what’s the big deal? Well, archaeologists have dated the pipes to a time when people were still trying to figure out how to cook meat without setting their back-hair on fire, let alone casting iron.

Why Can’t They Solve It?

Oddly, the pipes are clean of debris despite being older than Zeus. This suggests that they were not simply shoved into the ground for the hell of it, but actually used for something. Oh, and did we mention the mountain is completely inhospitable to human life?

As usual, a faction of nutjobs believes the Baigong Pipes to be an ancient astronomy lab or even spacecraft launching site left by extraterrestrials. This is possible, since the pipes contain a proportion of silica close to what occurs on Mars. Of course, the manhole cover outside your house does also, so take that with a grain of salt.

Some say they are a hoax. We must politely remind those people that you can’t wipe your ass in China without the government knowing, let alone set up a fucking iron forge and start burying pipes in the ground for the purpose of confusing passers-by.

Our Guess:

Long ago, a group of frustrated fishermen with lots and lots of spare time spent their whole lives building a plumbing system to drain that nearby lake. Then they figured they’d just walk right down there with wheelbarrows, scoop up the fish and eat like kings.

#3. The Giant Stone Balls of Costa Rica

The Mystery:

Costa Rica and a few surrounding areas are scattered with giant stone balls. They are smooth and perfectly spherical, or nearly so. Some of them are quite small, a few inches in diameter, but some of them are as large as eight feet in diameter weighing several tons.

They have been chiseled to perfection by persons unknown, despite the fact that Costa Rica is still not scheduled to enter the Bronze Age until 2013. The are balls everywhere and serve no apparent purpose, like a swing club on Gentlemen’s Night.

And God said, “It’s nice, but could use some more purposeless balls.”

Some of the balls have been blasted apart by locals hoping to find gold, coffee beans, or even babies. Some have been rolled around, but some are too heavy to move even with a bulldozer. Not that they have bulldozers in Costa Rica.

Why Can’t They Solve It?

About the most useful information anyone has gotten is that there are not, under any circumstance, any quarries anywhere near the balls. This information is actually useless considering the balls are carved from volcanic rock.

Our Guess:

In 1,000 years the eggs of the stone men will hatch, and their offspring will emerge to rule the Earth.

#2. The Baghdad Batteries

The Mystery:

The Baghdad Batteries are a series of artifacts found in the area of Mesopotamia dating from the early centuries AD. This was the approximate time when Gozer the Gozarian was roaming the lands, morphing into whatever you thought of and then devouring you source.

When archaeologists stumbled upon the batteries, they assumed they were just regular old clay pots for storage, but that theory quickly went out the window since they each contain a copper rod that shows evidence of acid corrosion. Now, in case you weren’t the biggest nerd in school, this means that the pots probably contained a liquid that would interact with the copper and produce an electrical charge. If true, they predate the first known modern battery by hundreds of years.

Source.

And that’s all well and good, but what the fuck were they using batteries for?

Why Can’t They Solve It?

Well, it’s not like we keep digging up ancient camcorders over there. Some stone reliefs called the “Dendera light” depict what some believe to be electrical arc lights, which would require something like the Baghdad Batteries to power. Others believe that theory is incredibly retarded.

More reasonable types say the batteries may have been used to electroplate items with gold. Others say medicine men could have used the batteries to shock people (giving the impression they had mystical powers or whatever).

It doesn’t help that the batteries are currently located in the Baghdad Museum, which means potential researchers have a sporting chance of being blown to shit on any given day.

Our Guess:

Take them to Egypt. Somewhere inside the Sphinx, they’ll find several holes. Plug these batteries in there and the Sphinx’s eyes will light up. Then it will start scooting around the desert floor making a mechanical barking sound.

And then someone forms the head.

#1. The Bloop

The Mystery:

Tired of having its mind blown by the guys in the archeology department, in 1997 modern science’s mind pulled itself up off the mat and triumphantly blew itself.

In that year, the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration recorded a strange sound in the ocean. Strange and LOUD. So loud that it was picked up by two separate microphones 3,000 fucking miles apart. The sound, dubbed “The Bloop,” doesn’t sound like anything at normal speed. However, the NOAA did us the favor of speeding up the recording to 16 times the normal speed, causing it to sound like a turd dropping into the toilet. Bloop! Except, you know, awesomely loud.

Scientists determined that its wave pattern indicates it was made by an animal, and not a giant electromagnet sucking a plane out of the sky, as the creators of Lost were no doubt hoping.

Why Can’t They Solve It?

There is no animal big enough or loud enough to make that kind of noise, not by a long shot. Not a blue whale, not a howler monkey, not a startled teenage girl.

Not long after the NOAA posted the sound to their web site, some HP Lovecraft fans on the internet quite reasonably decided that The Bloop must have been made by Lovecraft’s Cthulhu, a giant, murderous squid-dragon-thing.

Our Guess:

Yeah, we’re also going with Cthulhu.

Social Bookmarking: Correct Usage Can Advance Your Web Business

June 3rd, 2010 |

Author: admin

For a successful internet marketer there is always one thing on their mind, traffic. Not just any traffic but high quality targeted traffic. Making money will be easy once you learn how to drive traffic to your site. There are numerous differing marketing ideas online and this makes it hard to choose which one to use. If you are new to the internet marketing business it can be quite hard to figure out what method you should really be following. These means are both free and for pay marketing; we suggest that you primarily depend on the gratis ones so that you do not lose a fortune going with the for pay methods. Forum marketing, article marketing, and others jump to your mind when we discuss free Internet marketing. You should consider social bookmarking as another way to contact potential customers. As each day passes this method goes from strength to strength. For those of you who wish to spread the news about your website, bank more sales, and attain greater search engine visitors, etc. you want to investigate the way social bookmarking will help your e-commerce.

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Incoming links prove to be the biggest element which impacts the level of your website rank placements with the major search engines. It will certainly increase your rank, if you possess a great deal of related incoming links for your site. So the more backlinks you create the higher ranking you will receive. Your website link with all the various content comes with it, when you begin putting up bookmarks everyplace that you can on the Internet and they spread. Persons that look at your bookmark possess the ability to travel directly to your website, if they enjoy your content sufficiently. This will increase your links and search engine rankings in no time. Such backlinks which you receive off of these social bookmarking sites prove to be of excellent quality, since these are trusted sites that possess high page rankings.

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Among the chiefest benefits to be had from social bookmarking centers on the numbers of high quality backlinks that you are able to get for your webpage or site. If you do things correctly, your profile page will get a page rank of 4 with little effort. Search engines will then go to the page more often, catalogueing your new content and finding the links on that page. Which is a great opportunity because such links will doubtless lead to other websites of yours. Backlinks from high page ranks can cost lots of money; using social bookmarking sites gives you them for free. You can obtain some great high rankings just by using these bookmarking sites. Social bookmarking sites impacted the Internet enormously. There is good reason for this; the way we acquire information these days is completely different from the past. Since this development will only continue to expand over the years, you will truly aid your Internet business in expanding and coming to rule your market share through becoming a player in it.

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